Various attempts to remain human

Warning: Brief ****** Content
Mr Agony - what did you know?
That you couldn't tell me the secrets
To keep my heart beating, not thudding
Or fleeting
And keep my composure, my calm and collection
Let me gather my thoughts at a disection
Table, shared between five seats
Sister scent and sister sight,
Mr Wrong, and Mr Right
(They're always right)
Wrestled Aural pleasures, and rolled them around
And all the while, had their eyes turned
Oh!Imagine the shock once they had learned
Taken into myself - Temptress Touch
Temptress...taste
Had they the key to my secret?
They'll never learn the simple
Allure of haste

Mr Agony - I dare you,
Deny me these things
The wrath of an organ empowered
Beyond the wings of freedom
Decompose the being inside me,
Unravel the mistress
Whose eyes that bind me
And touch my chest,
A sensation so pure there are
No words to confess
For I am a voyeur, to watch is to give
Comfort and gratification,
The very moment of thought and conception
This is how we live

Mr Agony - my mind is collected once more
You have no such place
In a heart so demure
So bashful and coy,
I must give them names
Mr Agony, Mr Gratitude
Ms. Temptation,
Mr Pain


My Calamity
Hello, My Calamity
It was my consideration that you had ceased existence

And above all,
The gains, the lost
My Calamity stood tall

Is it understood
That simple reverence held you
Atop the tallest building,
Looking down at what once was self control?
With palms taut to the sky,
And stomach bare
My Calamity stood tall

I strapped you to the wicker chair
Stomped out all that was untamed,
The leather creaks, the plaster cracks,
The gifts laying spoiling on the mantelpiece- still wrapped,
Pretty bows, that threaten all,
And to the last,
My Calamity stood tall

The ones that have been
Tried to teach me grace
And ambiguity,
So that they gasp ‘Who is that girl?’
And point their fingers at me,
Not to bumble, or bask,
To feel the warmth rip off my skin,
Enshrouded by the raw,
Above all that is ladylike,
My Calamity stands tall

Post #3

Hallelujah, I'm cured.
The Holy Hour has completed its circle once more
And I am cleansed.
Or something.

Today is moving day for me, bits of my life are falling off shelves I haven't tidied in five years.

A Chilling Desire to Please

The whirlwind crashed my slumber - she looked like a ghost in the window, as she screamed, her throat tore;
"They've gone," she cried, "My babies...my boys!"
And she rapped the glass until it shattered.

Inside her head became a landslide, her fingers, her nails ripped at the walls, and I became frozen - too frozen to pick up the phone and call for help. No senses were at hand - vocal chords, statuette, spinning cruelly on a wooden base, echoing her cries.

It felt like murder - I could see it in her eyes while she clung to me. Strangely, I couldn't remain her solace. I was possessed to invade, to collapse my brain and bring them home to her - those lost brothers - those boys.

Unimaginable strength is born from silence, wrenched from burning pains in the pit of the heart. I forgot that i called them 'Sweetness', looked on them as mine - but they were not mine - their fingers, their eyes - they belonged to her. What is borrowed remains unowned. A borrowed bond.

Could they have once been so small tthat i had cradled them until the wails subsided? Yesterday....yesterday. And today, I wake the soliders, the marching warriors, to find them..to trek and trail and bring them home to her - she would not be without them. Her babies.
Her boys.

Post #2

And anyway, I still edit my texts a year later, I no longer write articles because I've no one to inform anymore, and I don't like anything at all. Anything. Let me see those game faces.

All of You Against Me

We'll hide together, and live like thorns
A chorus of tuneless tears, tucked beneath the shallow trauma
Wasting in the haystack - fucking in the backroom
Digging out my own tomb
and gown
Your fingernails, act shrouded desire,
Starved inside my own womb

When the blackout comes, and oh,
She comes,
And goes
as she pleases,
And leaves
as she pleases
And takes all of me, in her hands,
Prickled pines and trickled sands,
A worthless clasp of irony
To trace a pattern down inside me

Play host;
Dripping through the daybreak
Drag me up from the storm
The houses have fallen,
Faces, worn
But we'll give it our all
And all of you, against me
The cider press,
Buttons, undressed
All of you
Up against me

Post #1:

Aggro. Its a killer.

Blanks


You don't make much sense
When I listen,
Hence I no longer listen at all.

Just built blockades
Hardened layer upon layer of tissue around your
Face...eyes...nose...
There's a structureless mass in place of your
Face...eyes...nose
There are lips moving like the clamping pistons of a cavern
There are mouths silent, distraught
There are words that draw blanks,
Because they are made without thought.

Gouged pretty rhymes, petty;
Sublime with unreason
Somethings gnawing...gnashing
Something is chewing our tender laughter
Tentative repetition
Hence I no longer listen at all
Hence I no longer listen at all
Hence I no longer listen at all